China's Next Great Leap: Reincarnation, Resurrection and Hubris

The Communist People's Republic of China while extending its sovereignty over the afterlife of its citizens (both actual and Tibetans) plans to set up a department to deal with reincarnation and resurrection of its dearly departed dictators and generals, certain reports indicate. The very first batch of reincarnated or resurrected souls are likely to include that of Mao Zedong and other important Communist leaders of China. The inspiration behind this seems to be the strong stand China has taken on the question of the reincarnation of the present Dalai Lama.  The spiritual head of Tibetan Buddhism has more than once indicated that he might not reincarnate at all, ending centuries old Tibetan Buddhism tradition.


 However the Chinese administration has severely criticized the statement and has ruled that the question of his reincarnation is not for His Holiness to decide. Rather, it is the Chinese administration which has the final say over the afterlife of Tibetan Buddhism's supreme leader.  The atheistic Communist Party of China member and current head of head of the Ethnic and Religious Affairs Committee, Mr Zhu, in classic Orwellian double-speak says

"Decision-making power over the reincarnation of the Dalai Lama, and over the end or survival of this lineage, resides in the central government of China"

While the Chinese government has spared no effort to denounce the Dalai Lama as a traitor, opportunist, "wolf in monk's robes"  and labels normally applied to dissenters of Communist Party of China, the Chinese officials are hopeful that, under covert official supervision and manipulation, the selection by a sacred ritual involving participation of senior monks, visiting sacred Lake and divining dreams would be successful and the 15th reincarnated Dalai Lama would be selected following the sacred tradition. The only break from the tradition  would be that the new Dalai Lama would be ensured to be much more loyal to the party and the State.

Notwithstanding  the interest Prime Minister Xi Jinping has recently shown renewed interest in dialectic materialism of Marx and Lenin, the Chinese administration is completely devoted to continuance of the post of the highest spiritual leader of Tibetians Buddhism and vehemently insists that the current Dalai Lama reincarnate and more importantly, that the final authority over it rest with the  Communist Party of China. Speculations are rife that the party may not stop with the Dalai Lama.

Sources indicate that a new department is being constituted, which when roughly translated means "Department of Afterlife and Hubris",  to deal with reincarnation and resurrection of other people who the party thinks would further embolden their rising military assertiveness in the region and the world.

Of course Marx and Angel and even Lenin are out of question given their dedication to materialism, their souls, if they exist might refuse to take part in such intellectual heresy. But Mao and his more pragmatic as well as ruthless aides are said to be first on the line to be reincarnated.  Sources also indicate that applications are also being accepted from living persons but strictly from the members of the party only, religious people have been asked not to apply as the state is firmly committed to atheism and shuns all religions from matters of the State.

Posted By Danish 12:00 AM

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Mango Man elated from multiple scams.

A new superhero is in town called the Mango Man but there is absolutely no threat to other comic superheroes and their franchises because Mango Man is neither attractive nor glamorous. More importantly, Mango Man is not always 'man' nor is it one physical entity. It is a class of people whom the ruling elite as well as the ruled elite call the common man or common people ( to avoid charge of gender discrimination).  Of course it is a popular play on the Hindi words,'aam aadmi' but the usage here slightly of a different context. Almost every year, there is at least one reported incidence of poor tribal in Orissa dying after consuming mango kernel as a last attempt to ward of death from starvation. Now,starvation wouldn't be stalking just a few people and not their other family members which implies that they must have survived the poisonous meal. Therein lies the earliest signs of the superpower these people possess but this is not the only one. Often Mango Man can be found living in the midst of hazardous industrial wastes having been driven out of his natural habitat by the administration-corporate-

militant nexus lured by its rich mineral resources. Emmigrating to the nearest city,he settles in a derelicted site (called slum)  which is subsequently  demolished by municipal commissions,at the behest of powerful builders, to build a shopping malls,multiplexes at the site. Now he resides in the midst of toxic,industrial waste,generally dumped away in the suburbs.  Of course, in comic books and Hollywood movies the neuro-chemical reaction might have given him one or more extraordinary abilities but in this case there is a greater probability of him developing a fatal disease and his children being born with physical or mental deformities.


The superpower of the Mango Man lies in his resilience and imperviousness to exploitation and tormentation at the hands of the priveleged few. Highly placed sources say Mango Man is elated over the strings of scams,investigations and leaks. It is not the detection,investigation of the scams that lift his spirit but the fact that the Indian state has had that amount of wealth in the first place. Corruption,misappropriation of public fund have become an accepted norm but the amounts of money embezzled is what catches Mango Man's attention. According to him, the knowledge that the fund necessary to fight starvation and malnutrition  as well as access to basic amenities,did exist even if stashed away in foreign banks is a comforting thought. "As of now,the popular opinion was that the Indian state lacked the resources to uplift the under-privileged within reasonable time-frame. However,these revelations have proved that wrong and it gives us immense pride to know that the money embezzled in a single scam were sufficient for eliminating poverty in a group of villages.

The fact the these huge amounts of money stashed away in overseas tax-havens instead of being circulated in the market is just unfortunate. But the Mango Man undestands that the irrational gluttony of the leaders is a natural trait of some individuals and is willing to go the extra mile to help the next generations of gluttons. After all, he may not get a square meal a day,healthcare,education, electricity or any other basic ammenities but as an Indian his chest does puff in pride to see names Indian businessmen in Forbes list of the richest people in the world.

Posted By Danish 1:17 AM

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Paul Shows The Way To Error-Free 2014

As the FIFA World Cup 2010 comes to an end, FlFA officials are deliberating on  proposed changes to the rules for 2014 World Cup matches to be held in Brazil. Initially the talks were centered around the use of technology in future games to avoid referee mistakes which have had a considerable effect on the course of the tournament but now the discussions have shifted on the role psychic animals could play in the next World Cup.

Posted By Danish 5:29 AM

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World's Greatest Philanderers Alive

The grapevine has it that, Manforce may pull off a coup de grace by roping in world famous personalities for its upcoming event WGPA.  Dubbed as the poor man's Viagra, Manforce (owned by Mankind Pharmaceuticals) seems determined to expand its customer base in India as well as abroad. The TV reality shows sponsored by it did manage to grab attention of a segment of viewers but it has now reached a saturation point.

Posted By Danish 3:38 AM

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Fake IPL Player Blog: Adding Viral Marketing To Cricket

It seems PC was correct all along, polls and cricket tournament can't go together. They are just too BIG ! No, I am not talking from the security point of view which denied India the opportunity to host IPL (and in the process diluted my zeal to follow live scores), the distraction now comes in the form of a blog posted by someone who could be part of the Kolkota Knight Riders squad. Well, the very URL, http://fakeiplplayer.blogpot.com suggests that the author might not be a "real player", but the posts refer to people, facts, events and even predictions which an outsider would not be able to know. But the most interesting factor for me is the fact that the author doesn't seem very keen to prove his claim, the posts seem impromptu musings of a person who has been around in domestic cricket for some time and now want's to give out the insider view of IPL, especially about dressing room conversations, equations between players, coach, owner etc.

Overall, the blog is quite refreshing and informative as well. This week I intended to update this blog with something related to elections but then as PC said cricket and election have nastier habit of eating into each other's fan base far more than SRK and Aamir Khan do. IPL this year hadn't really captured my attention, I wasn't following each and every match but then I came across this IPL ANONYMOUS's blog and was compelled to defer my post on election :)

Btw, this blog has already turned viral (in terms of marketing!) so I have a hunch that if this blog goes on to become as big a hit some other "insider" blogs have become, it could have some impact on Social Media Optimization and Internet Marketing in general. Lets wait and watch....

Posted By Danish 1:22 AM

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