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Friday, April 18, 2008

A Tribute To Myself

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Posted by: Danish 1:49 AM

The other day I was sitting on the toilet pondering on the nature of things when suddenly it occured to me and I was really surprised that I had not yet realised how great I am! A door to my subconscious was opened, I felt a lot clearer now and could then recognize those random itsy-bitsy acts of mine for what they really were- marvelous deeds of a genius. In my arrogance I had overlooked my own brilliance and was instead appreciating the mediocrity of my fellow humans. In that moment of awakening I could almost feel the warmth of the radiant halo that must have been around my head though I couldn't see it myself. I was sorely tempted to seek someone else's assistance to just make sure but decided against it as I realised that showing my posteriority to someone else was not a good idea especially with my pants bunched around my ankles.


So I pulled up my trouser and socks and settled down to write this tribute to myself. I am fully aware that no one who knows me would recognize my greatness but that does not bother me at all. Even I myself, am not very sure why I should be considered great except that the thought came to me when I was answering nature's call. Throughout human history many a great ideas have come to great men and women as they sat performing this most intimate and private function of the human body so why should my thought be considered part of the crap just because I cannot not justify it ?


Many years from now someone might look back and confirm that this particular idea of mine should have been flushed down with the rest of the crap but till then I don't see a reason why I should not consider myself great and pay tribute to myself.


Note : I had composed this as a April Fool joke but didn't have the guts to post it. But Behan Mayawati's chutzpa a couple of days back was truly inspiring. . In case you are wondering what Im talking about, you might have missed the news item, "Mayawati unveils her own statue" !
Im thinking of changing the title of this post to "A tribute to myself, Behan Mayawati and all fellow narcissists"
:D

Posted By Danish 1:49 AM